58 People Describe The Most Bittersweet Moment They Have Ever Experienced
Life is rarely black and white. Happiness often comes wrapped in a sheet of sadness, longing, sometimes even regret. Complex emotions are what make us human.
To find out more about these dualities, Redditor BlaasianCowboyPanda posted a question on the platform, asking: "People of Reddit, what is the most bittersweet situation you've experienced?" And they've been heard.
From letting go of your loved ones to helping your pet cross the rainbow bridge, here are some of the most touching memories that were shared in the comments.
#1Adopting a decrepit senior dog with one hot mess of a body. He was cherished and adored by myself and daughter. My daughter was his main squeeze. He had health problems galore but he always persevered, and for a brief moment he got to BE a dog.
One year ago we helped him cross the rainbow bridge. My daughter made the decision that she would be there, she held his snout in her hands and kissed him the entire time. She was so brave, because of him.
Image credits: YourMothersButtox
#2Recently had one last sleepover with my childhood friend before he passed from leukemia. It was just like being kids again.
He couldn’t do much at the point he’d reached, but we listened to music, watched Luca (which he hadn’t yet seen), and just talked about life. And of course we stayed up way past bedtime haha
Image credits: randomtrashman
#3Sitting in the hospital room, mom was about ready to pass away from cancer, everything was shutting down internally. The date was my parents' 40th wedding anniversary. The last thing dad said to her was 'Thank you for 40 wonderful years.'
Image credits: CoffeeCat072083
#4My friend and his fiance wanted a baby and were doing IVF treatment and were down to their last chance. She got pregnant but my friend died three months in from a sudden heart attack.
So basically super bitter for six months but then his daughter was born and is healthy and beautiful.
Image credits: manawasteman
#5Breaking up with my then girlfriend because her dream of moving abroad permanently was coming true. I was happy for her but sad to see her leave
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#6Holding my grandfather's hand as he passed away. It was incredibly sad to see him go, but also relieving to see that it was peaceful and that he had been released.
Image credits: mejok
#7About ten years ago just before she died of lung cancer, my mom called me by my childhood nickname, told me she loved me and then fell asleep. That was the last thing she ever said to me. I was 35 when she died and she hadn't called me that nickname in maybe 30 years. I still tear up thinking about it.
Image credits: -Words-Words-Words-
#8Waking up from a suicide attempt.
Bitter because I woke up, sweet because I woke up.
Image credits: stolethemorning
#9Oh man. I'm always a sucker for the long love.
Amidst a loooong illness in hospice and dementia that meant he recognized no one my Grampie still lit up every day when my Grammie showed up. He would turn to whoever else was in the room and say "ah, I'm just the luckiest fella in the world to have the most beautiful woman in the world to love. I love you, Dolly."
She got to be there when he passed away and she died a few months later. I think she was just waiting for him to go first.
Image credits: Zealousideal_End2330
#10Hottest woman I've ever seen cheated on me.
Well she attempted to with a good friend of mine, and the good friend ratted her out.
This probably saved me a few million bucks when I look back at the whole situation.
Image credits: Ladder-up
#11My first two pets were two parakeets (aka Budgies). Both passed about 5 months apart but they both said goodbye to me in a way I haven't gotten to experience with any other pet. They were never fully tame and mostly just liked to go out of their cage and spend time together on the curtains or somewhere else that they could perch.
The first to pass was eggbound and her passing was devastating but instead of being alone when she passed I was able to hold her and she rested her head on my finger and chirped once before her time came. The second lived for another 5 months and was never as bouncy as before but in the last month, for an unknown reason she became incredibly tame. Not only did she perch, she would run up to me and snuggle against me. She continued this until one evening she passed peacefully.
I still miss them to this day, but I will always appreciate the goodbyes they gave to me. Here's to you Sunny and Sky.
Image credits: shadoweon
#12I finished University not that long ago. I was very excited because I literally went through four years of an engineering degree just for this moment and it finally happened. But the moment the graduation ceremony ended I just turned really sad. It's over. Everything good in University life is over. Plus I'm like, an adult now? What the f**k! I don't want that!
Image credits: TiBiDi
#13Well I may be getting deployed unexpectedly due to the current craziness in the world, so my wife and I decided to get married Saturday.
Happiest day of my life, but I'm nervous about possibly having to leave this week or next.
Image credits: RGB3x3
#14Watching my babies grow. Obviously I want them to grow well but if I could just pause time for a bit.
Image credits: aragog-acromantula
#15I always looked back so longingly on my first love. It was the summer we both turned 18 and it was my first time falling in love and everything seemed magic. She was a lifeguard and I still remember her long legs splayed over the lifeguard chair, her long blonde hair, her tan skin, her movie star sun glasses. On that lifeguard stand up high she was a shrine to everything summer. And I freaking loved summer. I had a manual labor job putting in swimming pools, damn that was so hot down there laying plaster with that Kansas City humidity.
We fell in love that summer and did everything together, every waking hour we could we spent together. In the day we would go down to the creek together and wade in the water and swim and lay on the shore, she always wanted to ride on my back across the creek to get to the other side, our side, where no one ever went but us. Sometimes we would climb on those oversized hay bales by my house and stare up into that cloudless summer sky and talk about what the future would be and going off to college and running track and the Olympics and how we would always love each other.
My favorite days though, God damnit I loved these days so much was when it rained. We both got off work when it rained so I would get an early call from my boss canceling my work and I would just lay there and smile and look at the ceiling and wait for my phone to ring, it was always her telling me to come over and we could spend the day together. Movies or the mall sometimes but usually we would climb over the gate to the swimming beach and go swim in the lake and feel the warm rain and dive under the water and come up over the dock. Best times of my life.
I've always looked back on them so longingly.I've been in love since and been married and divorced and dating but it seems my thoughts always came back to her. Even though we live in the same city it was 15 years since I had seen her. Back when I got married to someone else I had an outdoor wedding and even from the front I could hear her sobbing when I said the vows that I wanted to grow old with my wife, that was from a movie my first love and I used to watch together sometimes when it rained. She left right after the wedding and I hadn't seen her again for 15 years. I longed to see her, I even contacted her one time and suggested meeting up but she said she was happily married and would never meet up with me, even to just talk and reminisce. I longed to see her again just one more time.
Well it happened, I saw her again for the first time in 15 years. We were both at a U2 concert and we hugged and laughed and even danced when they played With or Without You. That night we all had a great time and we walked the women all the way to their car before going to ours. I realized when I saw her Honda minivan and sippy cups from her kids and saw her face that had gotten older that I didn't long for her. Don't get me wrong, she was still beautiful, incredibly beautiful. But she wasn't the girl on top of the lifeguard stand anymore. She had gone on with her life and had kids and drove a sensible minivan and wore sensible mom shoes. And then I realized I didn't long for her at all. What I had a longing for was me. When I was 18 and athletic and handsome, with my whole life ahead of me, that was what I longed for more than anything. A life before mortgages and bills and small backyards in the suburbs with fences, I longed for that part of me that was still back there with her at the creek. What it was like to fall in love and swim under the dock in the rain and laugh and hear the words I love you for the first time. I didn't miss her at all. I missed me. It was the most bittersweet realization of my life.
Image credits: Ask_me_4_a_story
#16divorcing my ex. she cheated and was abusive. it was LONG overdue and any feelings were and are gone, but the old romantic side wanted to be married until the end. wanted a 50 year anniversary. so sweet in that i was able to break free and find myself, bitter because divorce sucks. remarried and i love my wife to death, but at our ages, the big number anniversaries are very unlikely
#17Spending the last month of my mom's life caring for her, teamed up with my sister. We laughed, we cried, we looked at photo books, we ate lots of Mexican tater tots and coffee shakes. Of course, losing her to cancer was horrible, but it was her choice not to seek treatment, so my sister and I decided that, if she was going to go, we would give her the happiest sendoff we could. She died contentedly in her own bed, in the arms of her daughters and granddaughters.
#18When I was 17 or 18 I met a girl online. She lived in Florida, I lived up in New England area. We chatted all the time, got very close. We eventually met when I went down to visit my parents for spring break Senior year of college to FL. I was head over heels in love with her but the age, the distance and not having a career or money at the time really just didn't lend itself to us giving it a shot.
She went into the army for a short time, did service got out. Met a fellow vet who became a firefighter. Had 4 beautiful daughters was really happy for her and figured she had a great life. 3 years ago the husband was cheating on her, recording a house-sitter with a hidden camera in the bathroom and other places, also cheated on this woman with said house sitter and others. Was going to be tried for the recording and for statutory rape of the others who were all under 18.
Before that happened on Halloween that 3 years ago he got drunk, beat the hell out of my friend and fled. Committed suicide.
What that poor woman went through, and the underlying guilt I feel like maybe she would have had a better life if we were together will always seem bittersweet to me.
#19Deleting Forza Horizon 4. Ive played it science it came out and I'm sick of it, but at the same time I played it for 4 years and there are some good memories.
Image credits: 2005_F250
#20The last time I saw my Grandpa. He was in a coma, had been battling Parkinson’s for years. My relatives were talking to the nurse while I sat next to him, holding his hand. For a split second, he slightly opened his eyes, and softly smiled. I will never forget that, it brings so much peace but also pain.
#21Unintentional pregnancy the month after a miscarriage.
The pregnancy I'd lost had been planned, wanted, and tried for. The baby had a name and a place in the family I was building for myself. The miscarriage was physically traumatic, required surgical intervention, and had me seriously questioning if I ever wanted to be pregnant again if I risked that happening a second time. I had just decided that I couldn't face the thought of another pregnancy. And then I missed my period.
I got medical bills from my current pregnancy that said "prenatal care" and bills from my surgical procedure that said "incomplete abortion." I missed one of them somehow and got a call from a debt collector about it shortly after the second baby reached viability. (24 weeks of pregnancy, at which point the baby has 50/50 odds of surviving premature delivery.) My original due date passed and I was pregnant with someone else. And I couldn't get drunk about it, or even just lay in bed not eating or showering, because I was pregnant with someone else.
The second baby is a healthy toddler and is currently watching his big brother play video games. He is very loved. Carrying him scared the absolute s**t out of me.
Image credits: 52BeesInACoat
#22A friend's step father had been thru a nasty divorce ~20 years back at the time. Was told his disabled daughter died in a car accident. His daughter was told he died in a car accident.
Daughter never stopped looking for him but he was a very tin foil hat kinda man. Didn't work anything that wasn't under the table, Didn't own anything that could be tracked, whole nine.
He had a fall one night and got very sick. Decided to marry his long time girlfriend for the health insurance.. court house wedding, straight to the hospital. He was hours away from death, was put into a medical coma and admitted to ICU. Lots of touch and go. Needed major heart surgery and some other unattended health issues caused complications.
I was living him and his new wife at the time. Wife was with him at the hospital when his daughter showed up at the door. She found him through the marriage certificate. I had to pull her caregiver aside and tell her dad might not make it after she spent some 20 years looking for him.
He lived a few years after that so was a happy reunion for them. But they day she found him finally, just to be told he may be on his death bed. I'll never forget that moment.
#23My fiance's funeral. It was literally the first time I got to meet his mom. And she was such a sweet lady. When I tried to give her back my ring because it had belonged to her mother. She refused to take it, she told me "My son chose you to give it to. And it would be rude of me to take back his choice." She probably still has no idea how much it meant to me.
I literally have no pictures or anything of him. But I still have my memories and my ring I keep in my jewelry box.
Image credits: Sickofitblonde
#24In Kansas City we have an amusement park and a water park that have combined into one now so its Oceans of Fun and Worlds of Fun. Its such an awesome day! You can ride a roller coaster and then go jump in the wave pool and go back and forth. My kids are getting older now and they don't need me as much, in fact there was an hour or so where I was sitting there all by myself.
Don't get me wrong, I don't mind it, I read a book and even had a nap. But its bittersweet because they don't need you as much anymore. I tell them how I feel though. I tell them I love being with them. I get just as excited as they do to go to the waterpark. At the end of the day we went to the old time diner place in the park and had french fries and milkshakes and in the booth when we were all drinking milkshakes I told them, ah, this is one of the good parts of life!
#25The only thing I can say is that being there with him at the end is a blessing. When my grandpa was dying in hospice care, nearly all of the immediate family (his wife obviously, his kids, and us, his grandkids) flew out to Tucson immediately. We spent days there, being with him (even though he was completely out of it), talking, reliving memories of him, and sharing stories that not all of us knew.
Then when we were getting ready to head back to the hospice the next morning from one of the family members who went back earlier that morning, we got a call that he was doing worse, and that we should get back there ASAP. We all missed his passing, and his wife, my grandma, just completely broke down, saying that she gave him so many years, and he couldn't give her 20 minutes to get there to be with him at the end...god, that was so hard to hear.
The only good thing about that day was that he was no longer in pain. But holy s**t, it crushed all of us. We adored that man.
#26Saying goodbye to all of my friends and my hometown to move to college. I'm excited for this new adventure but all of us chilling in my basement playing board games for the last time killed me the moment they had to leave. We were all doing just fine until then, when one after another they started crying as we hugged goodbye. I held it together. The moment they drove away I sobbed. Happened about a week and a half ago so it still hurts. I know that I have (and will) experience much more sad things but this is fresh enough that I'm still heartbroken.
#27My family got a puppy when I was about 5. My freshman year of college he had to be put down. Every part of his body was failing. He couldn't stand on his own, fur falling out, infections that wouldn't go away, etc. and the vets couldn't help him no matter what they did. My mother finally made the choice to let him go peacefully rather than try to force any more treatments and hope they ease it. I opted to be the person to go back with him when the time came.
I held him and cried. But I pet him behind the ears the way he always liked and made sure he knew he had one of his humans there. There was relief in his eyes when he went. Like he understood what was happening and was okay with it. Finally able to rest.
I didn't want to let my childhood pet go. But I'm glad he didn't have to keep suffering and he didn't have to go out alone.
#28I realize it likely seems small, but sending my youngest off to college. He’s not “mine” per se, but he’s basically mine just the same and has been since he was ~4 and I became his step-mom. He has grown into an interesting, funny, intelligent, and kind-hearted young man with the sweetest heart you’ve ever encountered. Literally, I choose to hang out with him over many other people in my life. He’s worked very hard to earn his scholarship to college, and his dad and I are incredibly proud of him. I love seeing him succeed and reap the benefits of his work. I love seeing him begin to spread his wings and fly.
But I miss the absolute hell out of him. Coolest damn step-son on the planet, and I’ve been lucky enough to claim him as my own.
#29Dropping my little brother off at college. After the initiation event my family was kind of scattered around the place rounding us up to leave. I went to the bathroom and when I came back I saw my brother through the window, looking around like…what now? My urge was to go out and talk to him but I had already said my goodbyes, so I followed my parents to the car. I always get teary eyed thinking of it. Feels like a scene from a movie
#30My daughter's double amputation just after her first birthday. It was the most difficult experience of my life, especially the hours leading up to her going into surgery, and I'm too squeamish to let myself think about what the procedure actually involved. But due to a bone defect she would never have been able to walk, or run it dance or climb, unless she'd had the operation. We had to sacrifice her adorable little baby feet. We lost a little part of her that day, but she gained the ability to walk, so it was totally worth it.
If I ever feel sad about what she went through, I just look at her and the sadness goes away because I'm bursting with pride.
#31My dad crying out of happiness while wishing me a happy 15th birthday...
I couldn't really process what I felt, because I was secretly dealing with mental health issues since the past 1-2 years and I pretty much forgot what happiness is and have been in a numb type of mood. I believe that that night was the first time I cried out of what may have been happiness.
#32Getting the greatest job and worst boss at the same time.
Image credits: TheManWithACleanFace
#33At my grandmas viewing my little cousin (2)and her dad (my uncle) walked up to see her and to say their goodbyes. As they walked away my little cousin turned to her and waved goodbye
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#34Realizing there was a mutual love with a friend, but that it was platonic, and we absolutely wouldn't work as a couple
Image credits: UltimateAnswer42
#35I attended my maternal grandfather’s celebration of life earlier this afternoon.
My grandfather at heart was a bit of a party animal, and most of all, a really jolly guy. I know for a fact that there was no way he would’ve wanted a funeral in the traditional sense, but rather, he would’ve wanted us to try to take the time to remember all the good memories we had together with him.
And so we did.
We talked about how he told a professor teaching a college algebra class he was failing, that nobody in Hawaii spoke English as a first language, which allowed him to drop out of the class several weeks late. I got up in front of the crowd and told a story about how he would occasionally make me jelly sandwiches with a slice of cheese in it as a kid. We watched a video of him singing his high school’s alma mater together with a classmate of his during a class reunion several years back.
Grandpa in his final years was a bit of a shell of the man he once was; Alzheimer’s Disease caused a lot of damage to his brain, turning the guy who was once the boisterous life of the party to a man of few words. But his celebration of life reminded me once more of the amazing man Grandpa once was.
The crowd laughed at times, but at others, I felt like I was being hit in the chest with a baseball bat as I heard my grandmother and younger cousin stifling sobs as my aunt recounted the final moments we had with him. My own father, one of the most stoic people I know, admitted to feeling a lump form in his throat as we sang the lyrics to the song Aloha ʻOe, how we’ll someday meet again.
It’s one thing to be given a “thank you” for a random act of service, but another to be thanked for being your grandfather’s grandson as he lay on his deathbed in a rare moment moment of clarity, and having to relive that moment as your aunt mentions it in a speech.
Sitting through that service may have been a bit of an emotional roller coaster, but ultimately, I feel I came away stronger, and ultimately, a bit wiser, knowing that we finally got some official closure to it all.
It may have been hard, but we all came together as a family once more, and were reminded of how sacred life is. Each day is something we can’t take for granted, and we should all make it a point to love on and spend time with our loved ones.
There’s still times where part of me pauses for a second, wondering where’s Grandpa? when my family goes out to eat or when I need to help out my grandmother, but I think that with this closure, I’ve finally accepted that he’s gone, and that it’s okay that he is.
#36The last conversation I had with my Grandad he was reminiscing about when he was a farmer, and started talking about his horses. I asked him how you took care of a horse back then (he stopped farming in the 1950s, the conversation was in 2004) and he spent a good 30 minutes explaining what they did and how much land you needed etc. A simple conversation about country life and animals, two of his favourite things.
I live in another country so when I said farewell I had a nasty feeling it'd be the final time I ever visited or saw that house. He died 10 months later. The next time I was able to get to England was in 2011 and I visited his grave instead.
Image credits: zerbey
#37Finding out my housemates suicide attempt was just a cry for help
Image credits: DrSwagWizard
#38Wrecked my truck. Got some stitches and a mild concussion but otherwise I was fine. Insurance paid out and I bought a car with the money.
I wanted to get a car anyways because I didn't need a truck anymore and the cost of gas was killing me. So now I have a one inch scar on my eyebrow but I get almost 30 mpg vs ~18 mpg and I love it
Image credits: iBelieveInSpace
#39When I was 11, my family and I went to Laos. It’s a repressive country where people are almost never allowed to leave (I can’t think of any situation where they were able to). It was really sad to see my dad’s siblings crying when we had to leave. I’ve never seen my dad cry either. I can’t imagine not knowing the next time I’ll be able to see my brothers.
Image credits: TakahashiCherry
#40Finding out my crush liked me back.
However she was going to switch cities and we were too young so I let it go. It hurt, but it was for the better of both of us.
Image credits: Sufficient_Art_6874
#41When my father was dying it was kind of sudden but there was a moment at the hospital where he was awake and we were going in one at a time to say goodbye. He couldn't speak but he was giving understanding looks, as my brother, his adult grandkids, my mom went in. I was last because I knew he would want a little more time, I'm his youngest and we have a different relationship, not better just more friends ish.
When I went in he immediately motioned in a way that I knew he was thirsty, the nurse saw too so she gave me water to rub on his lips. It was so sad and so intimate. Like he wouldn't burden anyone else with his comfort in this moment? I had been quietly taking care of him for most of my life and had recently moved to NY and it was the furthest we had been apart but he still saw me as being able to care for him. That was our last moment together before I watched him die like 10 hours later. I was the one to tell the nurses to stop reviving him because everyone else was being.... a lot?
At the time I thought it was a sign of this really great bond we had, but now I realize I actually took on a lot of emotional stuff for him I was probably a little young for. But he also may have been ok doing it because I knew how he felt about me so I didn't need a moment, or maybe he just couldn't hold it back anymore. Who knows.
#42I was talking to this person on a specific forum once. Both of us were equally engrossed. I don't know how but it gradually morphed into a lovey-dovey conversation as we kept talking. Shortly thereafter, we found out we had a Twelve year old age gap. I was Sixteen then and he was Twenty Eight. I laugh like an Idiot every time I recall. It feels strange but silly and sweet.
#43Moving back to my own country after studying in the US for 3 years. I was sad to leave my friends, but happy to leave the country.
Image credits: LadyoftheFjords
#44Receiving a check for my inheritance as part of Dad's estate.
#45Marrying my husband and moving out of my parents’ house. My parents have always been kind and supportive of me. They made it difficult to say goodbye. It was tough looking back at the house as we drove away to start a new life.
#46I let her go. Because i knew i was not the right man for her. It's been years but she still visites me in my dreams and she always smiles at me. Sometime ago i woke up with tears in my eyes. I loved her. When ever i saw her i immidiately felt good, warm inside. She is happy now i know this. And i'm still convinced i made the right decision, she found a better man. But when I think of her, sometimes..., you know... "what if..." Love hurts but i'll keep a special place in my heart, just for her :)
#47My last interaction with my grandfather was on Christmas 2017, his last birthday. He had Alzheimer's, among other things, but when he and I were alone that night, he was lucid. I asked him if he would be able to attend my wedding in six month's time, he said he wouldn't make it since he'll have to look after my grandmother (she has mobility issues, but otherwise healthy enough for her age).
He died about a month later.
Image credits: Tapusi
#48My dog getting put down the same day I arrived at Disneyland for a friend’s birthday trip.
#49There was a 10+ year feud between my mum and her parents/sister, which resulted in us not seeing or speaking with them for that duration. It was killing my mum not speaking with her parents (my aunt caused the whole thing) and I dearly missed my family.
I travelled to them unannounced and without telling anyone to fix things and re-build bridges - it worked. My grandma then got pancreatic cancer and passed very quickly after (literally within a couple of days).
I’m so thrilled I managed to bring my family back together and my mum got her mum back for a bit but I know it wasn’t enough and now my mum wishes she’d tried to fix things herself much sooner. It’s happy and very sad all at once.
#50My best friend was in a very bad car accident. This was the mid aughts and no one quite understood how bad opioids were just yet. I personally wheeled him out of the hospital and a doctor in a white coat gave him a huge bottle of oxy.
This set him down a bad path that none of us realized before it was too late. He ended up losing everything - girlfriend, job, apartment etc. and spent a decade begging, borrowing and stealing. I loved this guy but he began lying to me as well to get his fix.
At one point he was able to straighten out some. Got some treatments that helped him resist the urge and got a job trucking. He would call me during runs and actually be lucid. One day we met up and spent hours together. It was like I had my friend back and I didn’t want the night to end - kept making excuses to stay longer.
He got into a big accident during one of his runs. Partial paralysis and total loss on the vehicle. Now he can’t work and stays at home teetering on the edge of a relapse. He’s better than it was, for now, but all I have left is that one wonderful summer night.
#51Yesterday actually. My gf had to go to a work trip and I had to drop her off at the airport. I’m not a clingy guy, but I am a sensitive one. Was really proud of her for taking this opportunity but also sad cause I won’t see her for about 6 weeks now. Teared up in the car on the drive home
#52Graduating from university.
I was incredibly sheltered growing up and as a consequence, I was scared of everything and would jump at my own shadow. I had my first taste of freedom at 16 and up until that point, I had never had noteworthy life experiences - no sleepovers, no going to the mall on my own, didn't know how to cook, etc. Yes, my parents had watched me like a hawk growing up and didn't allow me to do a lot on my own. Anyway, on to uni. I was young, tiny, wispy, shaking with anticipation at the prospect of moving out, going away and living in a university dormitory with my peers. I didn’t know anyone. I didn’t think I would make any friends but I did, and we did everything together.
I remember getting sick and missing my mom and my roommate passing me the flu medicine from her own stash. I remember trying alcohol for the first time and my friends laughing silly while a girl throws up behind the couch. I remember discovering boys for the first time and deciding they’re not as icky as I thought. I remember going on road trips, holding hands with strangers I met in a mosh pit, trading kisses and spit with the most beautiful boy only to forget his name and face the day after. My classes were interesting and the beautiful weirdos I met as I hopped and skipped through my university life were just as engaging and so I studied them just as intensely.
I remember surviving my freshman year and being drunk in my own potential. Oh, to be young and invincible! Adulthood has its own set of fun and challenges but I know that I will never be this combination of hope, innocence, curiosity and bravado ever again.
#53Visiting my grandpa for the last time. He died two days after I saw him. He was pretty out of it in those last few days, but he was quite lucid while I was there. My mom later told me that was the most lucid he had been. I spent about 4hrs with him, and I'm so grateful for that time. I try to not remember him that way, because the cancer had absolutely ravaged him, but I am so glad I got to spend that time with him.
He helped raise me (my dad wasn't there most of my childhood) so his death was really devastating for me. It's been about a year and a half and still feels pretty surreal.